Friday, November 28, 2014

A Merry Friggin' Christmas (2014)

Russian title:
“A Fucking Christmas Miracle”
Directed by: Tristram Shapeero
Written by: Michael Brown
Starring: Joel McHale, Robin Williams, Candice Bergen
Rating: PG-13
Running Time: 1 hour, 28 minutes

Pre-Conceived Notions: Logging on to Rotten Tomatoes to yoink the poster for this site, I noticed that the critics panned this film, and the viewing audience agreed. Then to get the introductory elements ready for the post, the words, “Candice Bergen as Donna” made me cringe. There’s something about the name Donna sans last name that just screams “This is a bad movie! Ex-patriate now while it’s not too late!”. I didn’t even recognize her at all watching the trailer.

But it looks like this will be one of Robin Williams’ last movie roles, and for that reason I hope the movie is at least decent. With such a towering movie career behind him, I want him go to out with a triumph instead of a meh. Because that would make things even more tragic.

But with the weak premise, and the addition of the hobo Santa, I’m afraid Rotten Tomatoes and the viewing public may be right about this one.

Why I Haven't Seen This Film: Because it was released this month. And yet again, I didn’t know of its existence until 2 hours ago. That’s a good enough reason, I think.

Bit-O-Trivia from the IMDb page: This is Robin Williams’ first and only Christmas movie.

1 hour, 28 minutes later…: I’m not going to mince words, here, not only because it’s late and I need all the strength I can get holiday shopping tomorrow, but I really shouldn’t be trusted with knives. And my jokes are getting worse by the minute.

I didn’t hate this film. It was very low-budget, and the writing seemed to be more geared toward episodic formats, but, by and large, it wasn’t horrible. That being said, I didn’t absolutely love the film, either.

But I can’t put my finger on why I didn’t love the film. I think it was because the acting was half-hearted? I didn’t buy Robin Williams as the hard-hearted degenerate father, and I didn’t buy that Candice Bergen would stay with someone like that. And she didn’t even look like herself. She looked kinda old and matronly.

And even though the writing wasn’t horrible, it wasn’t super good, either. It was like the writer got the idea of writing this film after binge watching a whole bunch of Christmas movies and made a list. “Okay… it would be cool if we had a drunken hobo Santa. And what if one of the cousins was a champion speed eater? Oh! And then the grouchy dad could be a Port-a-John dealer! Yeah, that’s it, and then who doesn’t love an inept cop? And Bea Arthur paintings! And people falling out of attics. Oh, this is going to be good!” Rinse, repeat, put in blender, and dump into a screenplay. Boom. Movie.

If you didn’t take it too seriously, though, the movie served its purpose. I laughed. My mother and her partner laughed. It was what it was.

Final Thoughts: Despite trying really hard to be funny, the writing was like something out of a freshman screenwriting class. But grade-A actors took it and did what they could with it, and turned it into something quirky. But, with the right network behind it, and a team of script doctors smoothing out the rough edges, it could be a really cute show. Something like a Modern Family. 3 out of 6 slices of pizza that you forgot to put in the fridge, but it still tastes good in the morning, so you eat it anyway.